How Things Are
by Eva-Mizuki-Levaris
Summary: Co-Author for CaseyBensonNovak. Casey, and Olivia are just falling into a groove with their secret romance, but can one tragedy tear them apart forever? Will Casey survive?
1. Chapter 1

_**I am a Co-Author for this story!**_

_**This is my friends Chapter. You can also read it on her page, please review there as well!**_

_**CaseyBensonNovak is the other writer- {link= www. /u/2061616/**_ _**}**_

A month had passed since the night Casey and Olivia took their relationship one step further. After having a few Friday night drinks with the rest of the squad, they had stayed behind, engrossed in conversation. One thing had led to another and they had ended up discussing what they looked for in a relationship. It was then that they realized they wanted all the same things, and before they knew it, they were confessing their feelings for each other.

They had gone back to Olivia's apartment and spent the night cuddling, talking, kissing, and doing whatever they pleased together. It had been around four in the morning when they finally fell asleep.

Casey pulled out of her memories and glanced down at the stack of paperwork on her desk. She sighed and picked up her pen just as someone knocked on the door. "The door is open Detective," she called, recognizing Olivia Benson's signature knock. Nobody knew they were together, since their jobs forbade it. So in the hallway of the office, at the precinct, and at the courthouse, they hid their romantic relationship with a strictly professional one.

Olivia opened the door and closed it gently. Her hair was down, which was just the way Casey liked it. She was still wearing her suit from court that morning. It fit her in all the right places; Casey resisted the urge to pounce on her. "Case?" Olivia's voice sounded worried.

"Huh?" Casey blinked a few times. "Sorry babe."

"Were you daydreaming again?" Olivia asked as she folded her arms across her chest and gave Casey the look that was usually reserved for perpetrators she believed to be lying.

Casey nodded, ashamed. "I have been spacing out all day. During the trial this morning, I couldn't help but think how much I wanted you. Before you knocked on the door, I was caught up in a memory of our first night together." She moved her paperwork aside as Olivia sat down on the edge of the desk. As she gazed into the beautiful brunette's alluring chocolate brown eyes, Casey wondered yet again why Olivia wanted her, out of all of the other women in the world.

"I think about that night all the time," Olivia replied. "I also think about all of our other nights together. I think about you Case." She smiled softly and paused for a moment before continuing. "Anyway, I came here to see if I can pry a certain beautiful ADA away from her work long enough for a lunch date."

Casey pretended to be deep in thought about Olivia's offer, when in reality, she wanted to jump up and down and say yes a million times. That wouldn't be very professional or ladylike. "Sure Detective," she finally answered. "Where are we going?"

"A cute French café a few blocks from here. I know you love French food, and I have a craving for croissants right now."

"How is it that you eat so much, yet you stay so damn thin?" Casey asked as she grabbed her sweater from the sofa. She was used to the fact that Olivia had a bottomless pit for a stomach.

Olivia's reply was simple. "An hour of sex burns one hundred fifty calories. Therefore, I have you to thank for keeping me so thin." She smirked and walked out of the office.

"That, and all the weight goes to your boobs," Casey muttered before locking the door and following Olivia to her car. Traffic wasn't as bad as usual, so it only took about half the time to get to the café. They picked out a table near the window and waited to be served.

"You said this morning that you were going to make a deal with the Thomas kid. What made you change your mind?"

"The last time I saw him was at his competence hearing. He was…" Casey trailed off. "You can't fake being schizophrenic, and you especially can't be as convincing as he was. I know what it is like to deal with a schizophrenic, and it's not easy. I can't put someone like him in jail; he needs help. I'm going to offer him a deal: time served in a mental health ward in exchange for a nullified prison sentence. I have to help him Olivia," she added, more to herself than Olivia.

Olivia smiled and nodded as a server delivered a basket of croissants to the table. She took one and bit into it, sighing. "Elliot and I can't agree on-" Her phone beeped. She answered it with an apologetic shrug. "Benson." After a few moments, she said "I'll be right there," and hung up.

"You're leaving?" Casey asked in disbelief.

"I have to. I'm sorry."

"I love you," Casey murmured as Olivia walked out. What the hell could be so important?


	2. Chapter 2

_**Eva's Chapter! :D**_

_**I DON'T own the TV show Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, and if I did... You wouldn't watch it.**_

Olivia had been called out to a scene, she wondered why it was so urgent. They had also told her that she'd be requested _specially__**. **_The word had dripped off their tongues like a poison, and it made her a bit uneasy. She was, admittedly, an astounding detective, but to be specially requested at a crime scene wasn't particularly normal.

"Detective Benson?" A short, and pudgy who's dark gray hair seemed to be balding NYPD officer stepped up to shake her hand in a forced politeness. It struck her as odd that he was so openly dissatisfied with being polite to her, but she brushed it off. Police work wasn't easy, he may be stressed.

"Officer," She nodded at him, and held her hand out for the report. "What do we have?" She was all business, even if Casey was still fresh in her mind.

"It's a rape case, obviously. Ten year old girl found raped, and murdered in her apartment home." A typical case of rape, but she was so young. The officer continued. "The semen we found matches a unlikely source." Olivia nodded, and handed back the report.

"Let's go in." She didn't ask who the perpetrator was because she wanted to see what he'd done first, but that was her biggest mistake.

As she stepped into the room, Olivia almost lurched at the smell. A small girl sat tied to a computer chair. Her small legs still hadn't lost all the pugde of a child, and her face was as round and soft as a porcelain doll. Her legs were tied to the bottom of the wheels, and the moving of the chair had broken both ankles post-mortem, her arms were tied behind the chair, and her undeveloped breasts we exposed, and cut open in a 'Y' incision, the way they do in autopsies, so you could see every organ, and hanging piece of flesh. All this was horrible, but the worst of it was her eyes. She had strikingly gorgeous green eyes, and they were open, and staring in mock accusation. Staring right at Olivia screaming in her mind.

_How could you let this happen? How could you!_

Olivia just stared into her eyes, her glossy green eyes.. Those eyes became burned in her memory like they were her own. As she stared at the child the officer pulled her away, he had been talking, but she didn't hear a word.

"Who?" She asked lowly coming out of her trance.

"Excuse me?" The Officer still seemed to distrust the Detective as if she really had done the crime.

"Who did it?" She asked a bit louder. Then she screamed. "Who could have done that!"

"Detective Elliot Stabler." Olivia's world crashed down around her.

_Stabler? There's no way he would ever..._

"There has to be some mistake, Detective-"

"It wasn't a mistake."


	3. Chapter 3

_**Hey readers! This is not my chapter! It's my friends :)**_

After leaving the café, Casey went back to the office and ordered beef chow mein from her favorite Chinese restaurant. Once her paperwork was finished, she took her lunch and the rest of her things home. As she unlocked the front door of her apartment, she sighed. "Thanks Olivia. That date was wonderful," she murmured to herself.

As she hung her car keys on their hook and laid her briefcase on the table, she fought back tears. She felt stupid for thinking the lunch date would actually happen this time. Sighing again, Casey curled up on the couch under a blanket as she silently ate her chow mein with a pair of special chopsticks she had bought a few years back. By the time she retrieved the fortune cookie from the carton, the tears were falling freely. Olivia had been acting really strange towards her. She had been cold and snippy, but Casey couldn't figure out what she had done wrong.

She opened her fortune cookie, unfolded the tiny piece of paper, and read her fortune. "Things are not what they seem," the paper said. Casey shook her head and turned to face the back of the couch, then cried herself to sleep.

A knock on the door startled her awake. "It's open babe," she called, wondering if Olivia had even heard her. Maybe everything would be better now.

Olivia opened the door and, without even saying hello, went straight to the refrigerator. She glared inside, then slammed the refrigerator doors shut. "You're out of beer," she snapped.

"I don't drink beer," Casey responded, raising an eyebrow in confusion. Clearly Olivia was pissed about something; she only drank beer when she was really angry. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing."

Casey sighed and narrowed her eyes as she watched Olivia once again open the refrigerator. "Really? You're looking for nonexistent beer; you know I don't have any. You're giving me short, cold answers. You're slamming doors, storming around, and quite frankly, you're being a bitch. Don't lie to me and tell me nothing is wrong."

Olivia paused, holding a knife poised just above the mayonnaise jar. "It's work," she replied before spreading mayonnaise on four slices of bread.

"I figured that much. I'm going to assume it has something to do with why you left the café earlier. Why won't you talk to me?"

"Because it doesn't concern you! You wouldn't-" Olivia stopped herself, but Casey knew what she was going to say.

She looked at Olivia and slowly sat back down on the couch. "I wouldn't understand? Why do you say that Olivia? How can you say that? Is it because I'm not a cop?" She once more turned to face the back of the couch. "Or is it because I'm not Elliot?"

"It's just not something you're used to. I-"

Casey cut her off. "Not used to?" she repeated. "I've been working with the Special Victims Unit since 2003. In case you've forgotten, I have seen and been through a lot. I may not be out there in the field making collars and chasing perpetrators, but I still know what goes on in the cases. You are being elusive and cryptic."

"Hopefully I'll be better once the case is over," Olivia responded as she finished making her sandwiches and bit into one of them.

"It isn't just this case Olivia. You've been this way for a couple of weeks and I have no idea why, because you won't talk to me." Olivia sighed loudly. She set her sandwich on the plate and leaned against the counter. "Work has been stressful. I think…I think it would be best if we took a break."

"From work?"

Olivia shook her head. "No. From us. I'm sorry." She stood up and gently kissed Casey's cheek, then left, closing the door behind her.

Casey felt the hot tears spill out of her eyes yet again. Within seconds, she was crying harder than she had in a long time, for no reason, yet for every reason. She didn't know what she had done to make Olivia want a break from her, but she knew one thing: she was going to find out.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Hey! Thanks for the reviews! You guys rule :)**_

_**Eva's Chappie. I'll be doing more Olivia because I can be angsty and bratty really good :P**_

As Olivia left Casey's small apartment, she felt horrible for what she had done, but something in Casey's eyes replayed that horrible accusation. 'How could you let this happen?'. Olivia hadn't ever fathomed that Elliot could ever be capable of such a horrendous act. He was always so adamant about getting the victims and their families the justice they deserved. She had always looked up to him, and she had always loved his work, but now? Now she knew that she had looked up to a monster, a man capable of hurting an innocent child who had yet to know the world. How could they not blame her? Tonight she needed something a bit stronger than beer..

She had always promised herself that she'd never be her mother, but tonight she drank herself into a numb stupor. She had fallen asleep in her work clothes, a bottle in her hand. It was almost poetic, but her wish to chase off the images became a meaningless attempt since they only worsened in her dreams.**(A/N: Shift to Olivia's POV for dream sequence.)**

_Casey was with me, and they were so incredibly happy. They were walking hand in hand down an old country road a smile on our faces, things were just how they were supposed to be. Casey was wearing a simple white sun dress that fit her beautiful form just right. The cut allowed me to see the peaking cleavage, and there were no sleeves. She was beautiful, beautiful enough to leave you breathless._

_The sky was darkening, a beautiful summer rain to end this beautiful summer day, but the rain brought a dark figure with glazed green eyes. She held a scalpel in one hand, and her walked was askew because of her broken ankles. She was naked, and her opened up in the Y incision. One problem was, her heart was still beating, and her porcelain doll face held a look of utter contempt._

"_How could you!" She screamed, her voice was laced with horror, and disgust. Casey just stared at me opened mouth as if I truly had done the act._

"_I didn't, I swear... It wasn't me!" I cried helplessly as I saw the girl turn to Casey._

"_Save me... She might as well have. She let him! Please help me." She held out her creamy hand, and Casey dropped mine. She was taking the side of the poor sad little girl, and truthfully I would have to. They were right, I was a monster for trusting a monster..._

Olivia woke up with a start, her face was sweaty and tears burned in her eyes. Casey wouldn't understand, she could never feel what Olivia was feeling. With that thought Olivia threw the bottle at the door smashing the glass with a bone shattering bang.

"I hate you! You're a monster!" She screamed, but she couldn't decide wether it was directed at herself, or Elliot. Really, did it matter? He was her partner, her friend, and, once upon a time, her idol. She might as well have been there when he did it because no matter what the outcome would have been the same. She should have seen the signs... Him slipping at work, losing any interest in chatter, no smiling, and his distant cold look. She had passed it off as stress, and now she was beginning to wonder if Elliot had lost it after all his work in the field. Did that mean she could lose it? Or was Elliot always like this? Was this girl first? Olivia had some questions to answer... But first she had to deal with her awful hangover. She had already forgotten Casey's broken heart... It didn't even go through her mind to fix that.

_**~~~A/N~~~~**_

_**Short, but good? Feedback maybe? :D**_


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